We all have one, the laundry list of ex-files. Each one with a different tab, “mentally abusive,” “scared to commit,” “too lazy to fight for the relationship,” and my favorite, “can’t handle a strong, independent, complex woman.” Regardless sometimes it’s difficult to accept that people come into your life for specific reasons and leave for a purpose too.
When it first ends, it feels like the world has been ripped from under your feet. Most times, it’s not the relationship you miss it’s the “schedule” that you’re used to that you miss i.e. the morning texts, your silly little insiders and the goodnight phone calls. The relationship ended for a reason whether it was (lack of) love or logic, there is a reason. A wise woman (called Sophia Bush) once quoted, it’s a reason, a season or a lifetime.
Somethings are not meant to last forever, right? I was reading one of my favorite bloggers post the other day (http://www.oliviarink.com) and she was discussing how you should always follow your heart but bring your brain with you when you go. We are all guilty of making decisions based off emotions. For instance I am a firm believer in, if you love someone, you fight for them as hard as you can, regardless of how logical it is or isn’t. This is not always my best quality and I am still learning and talking myself into “this was a logical decision, it doesn’t mean you can’t love him but I will be happier in the end.”
So I want to share what I have learned through past relationships in each of these categories:
- A Reason: This is probably the most common category. There is always a reason. Looking back most of my terminated relationships, they all led me to something or someone else. A lot of times I would jump to another guy to get over the last. However, the last “relationship” (I put that in quotes because I am not sure if that’s what it really was) that ended I decided to do things differently and move on by myself, not with someone else. At first I didn’t want him “moving on” before me, but I soon realized I was still making things about him. What was and still is best for me is to focus on myself, my relationship with God, my friends, family, my job and my passion. The fact of the matter is, a man is never your problem nor your solution. You find happiness within, not externally. Especially if you’re still hurting. Be hurt. Feel the pain. The only way to get through it, is to go through it.
Polling Question: What’s worse? Loving someone you can’t be with or being with someone you don’t love?!
- A Season: This is a brief moment you are with someone where they help better you for a piece of time. Maybe they have helped you advance yourself creatively or maybe they taught you what you will and will not settle for. This person can probably still exist in your life because it didn’t end painfully or with hurt feelings. It was a logical decision, not because you didn’t love each other. Throughout all of the relationships I have had I think they taught me a lot about myself. Again, I am not 100% there yet and my head and heart often have dramatic battles but I am getting there. We need to think about the future. Not live there all the time, but consider it when you are dating someone and looking to move forward. Is this is a logical choice for the long haul or an emotional decision for a season?
- A Lifetime: So far, the only lifetime relationships I have are my family and friends. I’m not really looking for forever anymore. I feel like in today’s society forever is a really difficult idea anymore. It’s just so black and white, forever or not forever. If you are more open minded in relationships then I feel disappointment is a little easier to handle when it comes your way. Look at it this way, if something or someone is meant to be forever, they will be. It won’t be frustrating, or hurtful or painful. It will be easy and you will WANT them in your life and you will WANT them around. When you meet someone who makes you a better person, you can be yourself with and most importantly, the situation allows; then maybe this idea of forever won’t seem to hard to grasp. Until then, just go with the flow and take people as they come for who they are and what they bring to your life.
I am thankful for the guys who let me go. Most of you have come back when you realized it wasn’t the best choice in letting me go haha. Luckily for me, I made a logical decision in not letting you back in which is why it has brought me to where I am today. Don’t lose yourself, or give up what you have worked so hard for for someone who won’t fight for you. If it logically works, then let your heart follow. If someone is letting you go, maybe it is for the best, maybe they really do care about you more than you think they do. I know it’s hard to believe, trust me, but there are genuine people who care. And when you push them away and they still come back and fight to stay in your life, that’s how you’ll know!
Hello my fabulous readers & welcome ♥
Fall fashion is probably my most favorite season. Yes, it’s a season in it’s own honestly. I think most girls would have to agree it’s the best time of the year to get dressed in the morning. Men, not so sure, but I am hoping this look book blog will make up your mind! In this blog I am going to give a quick overview of my favorite fall looks for women and men. I will be going into further detail in blogs to come! Enjoy!
WOMEN’S FALL FASHION
- Casual Cassie – haha! No but really I love denim. I just keeping buying jeans. These Black Orchid distressed beauties from Scout & Molly in Hyde Park (Tampa, FL) are amazing. They are relaxed fit meets party gal.
- Booties are my fall go-to down here. Wearing a knee-high boot in Florida happens for about 7-10 days a year.
Everything in this photo is from Scout & Molly’s Boutique in Hyde Park (Tampa)
- A clutch is like an accessory, which is why I love when they have great hardware!
- The Vince Camuto booties I have on are made of amazing suede. They are so soft & comfy!
- I love, love, love a great vest & a perfect fitting tee.
- Slides are IT for fall ’17 and these are TO.DIE.FOR! Who doesn’t love studded flats?
Fabu-Clutch is necessary!
Another great, relaxed fall look.
- One of the biggest fall fashion misconception is that you can’t wear white in fall.
F A L S E
- You have to do it right, so here’s a few looks that would most definitely be appropriate to wear out after Labor Day!
- A denim shirt with white denim is one of my favorite looks… period!
- This is one of my favorite looks from the shoot. I wanted to show you ladies that it’s totally okay to mix & match. I am still wearing my white denims, but threw on a feminine rose colored tank with some red accessories. This is a great look because it’s a little kick-ass topped with girly sass.
Military & country… what a great combo! God Bless America!
- I just love bomber jackets, don’t you? With this one I paired this fantastic floral & paisley bomber with a black tee that has a little pizzaz detailing down the front.
- Another misconception, black & tan is okay. Black & brown apparently is too, but personally I do not like black & dark brown. Tans, creams, nude, taupe… fine 🙂
- Go-to booties are a must have staple in the wardrobe!
MEN’S FALL FASHION
Here are some of my top men’s fashion looks!
- Bonobos has some great pants for men. They have these great relaxed, fitted pants called chinos. I love when men wear pants that tailored appropriately, it does matter guys! When you wear ill-fitting pants it can make you look larger or shorter than you really are.
- This classy gentleman below is sporting them!
- They also have a more fitted pants like my friend Matt here is wearing! Matt who works with me told me he loves to wear Bonobos fitted pants & clothing for men!
- Matt is casual & comfortable in his Friday work-attire. He looks like could be going to the office, to possibly swap out the shoes for some golf cleats & hit the green or maybe a quick happy hour with some co-workers (we were totally going to HH & he rocked his grey Chinos really well there!).
- Men, I always get the question what color to wear with grey when black is not obvious. You can definitely wear brown with grey like Matt here. I prefer blues with browns, especially a navy. Black would have been too much of a contrast with Matt’s blue.
Hi Hayley! Heated convo over a parking space 😀
- Another look I love on men is sweaters. I love a man in a chunky sweater. Men’s fashion is all about layering by the way. It’s like the more layers you wear, the hotter we think you look, even if you are sweating your buttons off!
- This guy makes me want to cuddle, just sayin’! He is so casual & cozy. All he needs is some hot cocoa, fire place & a good book!
- This is the coolest man I have ever seen. It really does not get better than this guys.
- A casual sweater, ripped denim & some Converse. C’mon! Who isn’t swooning?
- I want to go sit in a cafe with this dude & listen to some great music & drink some great beer (JK I don’t drink beer!).
- This is the second coolest guy I have ever seen. We all love a distressed leather jacket. He pulls this look off fantastically. And would you look at that layering! He nailed it. Loving the cuff!
- This cutie takes it to the next level with a flannel shirt tied around his waist. UGH I love a man who is bold enough to try something like this. Combat boots are so hot also. I have a pair & I wish I could wear them more. They make me feel like Lara Croft.
Well I hope you enjoyed my fast & furious quick fall fashion look book. I will be elaborating on some of the looks in the upcoming weeks!
XO, Cheers all!
Hey fashion lovers ♥
Ugh, my heart & this dress… I can’t. On Thursday September 28, VSylist hosted a fabulous sip ‘n’ shop at Scout & Molly Hyde Park in South Tampa. We sipped Prosecco, chit-chatted & layered up our crossed arms with as many beautiful pieces of cloth we could manage until a dressing room became vacant. This was the atmosphere I felt most in my element (besides church). I was with amazing women who were lifting each other up, spilling beauty secrets & smiling from eat to ear. It was a perfect night.
My girlfriend Martine & I at Scout & Molly’s with hand-made floral crowns. Queen status!
I walked out of the boutique that night with one perfectly more than perfect dress. I know you are completely aware I am on some Blair Waldorf Style high right now and search high and low for fantastically classy looks with high or bowed necklines and this night was not any different. I tried on a few things and they were all so gorgeous but I was craving something that slapped me in the face with perfection, haha (kinda like my relationships *taps finger tips, looks around*) then I saw this vintage inspired diamond in the rough of the back sale rack. Hello my name is queen Jenn I like tapered waist-lines, zumba and rose.
There was no question in my mind that I was going to own this dress. Where I would wear it…?? The fabric is stunning and the sewing on the neck and wrists are impeccable. Tamy invited me to a fantastic event the following weekend, City. Fashion + Art + Culture at the Art Museum and I knew it would be perfect.
The event was catered by Eddie V’s. WOW! Just WOW!
With high neckline it’s best to wear slicked back or partially slicked back hair and a minimal earring. The dress did not need much to accessorize it but I threw on a gold-silver ombre sparkle pump by Jessica Simpson and a silver clutch from Express. The lip could be none other than red. I felt so classic. I literally felt like a queen on Friday.
My best advice, when there is a an outfit or dress that you feel like a million bucks in, even if it is a million bucks you grab it. Because the feeling you get when you rock it, is priceless.
Check out Scout & Molly’s Hyde Park (the dress is actually the front page of the site!) Ask for Jaca, she is the manager & she is AMAZING! Tell her Jenn sent you!!
Hey Babes, happy Friday ♥
I started buying Kinsley Armelle around July and am still going strong. I love that the jewelry is super affordable, does not turn and looks great stacked! I started off white all white and gold and now have the pink line as well.
A wise woman once told me to spend more money on staple or plain pieces and just accessorize more. Meaning stay away from trends because they fade, so I always invest more in accessories because they last longer sometimes. I used to buy Lia Sophia a lot before they went out of business, which was sad but I still wear every piece I ever got from there.
Kick off the fall with some new bling and use my code for 10% off STYLEMYMIND10.
SHOP KINSLEY ARMELLE HERE
Good Morning Dolls ♥
One of my favorite fall looks for ’17 is “couch florals“. I never heard that term to describe fashion but according to Elle Magazine it’s a hot look for fall…. & I get it; they’re giant, and kinda vintage looking, I’m into it… IF it’s done the right way. What I love doing with delicate girly flowers or lace is pairing it with something edgy to rough the look up a little bit. This outfit is a great example.
I snagged this shirt at the Fab’rik end of summer sale in South Tampa ($10 babes!). I styled it up with over-the-top ripped black denims with DIY fringe hem and my Fab’rik booties. I accessorized with a pearl and black tie choker and a paid of pink and black cat-eye sunnies from Mirina Collections (use my code STYLEMYMINDJENN). Don’t be afraid to play around with this kind of look, or even leather and lace!
Good Morning ♥
As I was talking to my mother about packing for her trip to Italy I was giving her tips and tricks on how to pack. When I went to Europe I did an excessive amount of research on how to pack to ensure I did not OVERpack. I told her to try each outfit on to make sure they look good and then try packing basic pieces to mix and match. There are super easy ways to make an outfit go from day to night.
- Go from a bootie to a night shoe stilletto
- Wear a day hat like a fedora
- Go from a cross-body or shoulder bag to a clutch
- Jazz it up with accessories at night, maybe rhinestones and diamonds
- Wear a bold lip
♦BONUS TIP: Bring only two pair of your favorite jeans, a pair for boots and a pair for flats! It’s enough, promise!
My denims are AH-MAZING from a wonderful little St. Pete boutique called Salt Light Art. I fell in love when I walked in. It has a fantastic story behind it and the proceeds go to charity. Their pricing is great too 🙂
The top is a button-down off-the-shoulder shirt from Poppy Apparel (Use code STYLEMYMIND10) and my shoes are Donald J Pliner.
D A Y
N I G H T